Budget Blues

I know I complain about money a lot, but honestly, when I have to rework the budget nearly daily to make sure I am not totally screwed, it just weighs heavily on me. Right now, when I get a paycheck, pretty much the whole thing goes towards the bills that are due before the next one. I mean THE WHOLE THING. When I get paid tomorrow morning, and I then pay everything that keeps the creditors off my back, I'm left with about $100. That $100 is supposed to cover our food, gas and dog food for 19 days (at least, not counting things like lunch money for the kidlet, this little impending thing called Christmas, etc.). Dog food and gas take up about all of it alone (and before anyone suggests it like my mother and sister do, I am not giving my dogs up after making the obligation to them when I adopted them). So each time I have to buy groceries using a credit card, which then results in more that I owe in monthly bills. See the self-defeating pattern here?

Honestly, I went so far out of my way to be fair but protect myself in the separation agreement. I took the large bulk of debt, including all the joint accounts because I didn't want to be in trouble when the ex didn't pay them. I did not ask for alimony or child support even though I'm left holding the bag on pretty much everything that we bought and did together over the years. And at the end of the day, people who know about it tell me I'm a "fair person", but I'm still a broke ass mom who can't afford to feed her kid. Fucking nice.

Update: Insult to injury. It appears that my boss, who left suddenly about a month ago under somewhat strange circumstances, may have screwed me and another coworker out of my pay raise for this year, which should have showed up in the paycheck this week. Color me very, very fucking pissed.